Here I am! Finally!

I know so many of you have been asking why we haven’t updated the blog – I am very sorry to keep you waiting and so I hope some of this makes up for the delay! We are coming up on the 6 month anniversary (4/19) of the accident. Since I got home 1/22 things have been crazy.  Jani has effectively been a single parent for so long and now he has had to take care of me in addition to that, juggle fixing up both houses, and manage a ton of other things in order to keep things moving forward. This blog was turned over to me but among other things, it took time to put my thoughts down.  I hope you’ll stay with me!

I keep saying this but I really feel that I am so lucky to be alive and to have so many amazingly beautiful people as family and friends! Thank you so much for being with me through all this. The support I have received is truly more than overwhelming and I know that the thoughts and energy you have all invested is the major contributing factor to my well-being. There are so many people to thank - I hope to reach everyone in person one day but there is not a day that goes by when I don’t think about so many of you. For example, here in Greenville there are a great bunch – Teresa and Dave, Walker and his family, Bob, Dick, Jess, and the whole Physiology department and BSOM, Chad, Steve, the other early response folks, Drs. Reeg and Newell, as well as Omar, Frankie and all the nurses - the whole ICU and beyond including the outpatient rehab folks I work with now – Joanne, Krista, Dave, Penny, Sarah, Megan – as well as my Bunco group; some of the folks at Shepherd in Atlanta – Erica, Jeanette, Paul, Marlene, Sheila, Robert, Blair, Marion…; my friends from Seattle - Marsha, Megan, Melissa, Julie, Cathy, the Murry family and lab, Bardia, Hans, Sandi, and all those who went to the party held for me there; my friends in Kingston/Wolfe Island – Mandy, Lori, Hope, Jen, Robert, Sherry, the Soule family, Wolfe Islanders, and everyone who attended the event at St. Margaret’s to honor my 38th birthday; the boys in Chicago – Neil and Lou and their families; Loree in Vancouver; Vince in Winnipeg, the boys in DC – Jude and Drew; the Ponthiers in Perth Australia; Dr.McDonough and the pholks in the Physiology department at LSU in New Orleans; in Houston - Rachel, Bill, Susan, Kevin, Valerie and her family and all the people who attended the auction held for me there; my husband’s family in Hungary – Margit, Edit, Ibolya, Peter, Sanyi, their kids, and so many relatives who have extended so much support to me and to Jani; and of course my absoSmurfly phenomenal husband Jani, beautiful children Rowan and Encsi, my loving and selfless parents, and my devoted and brilliant brother Kal and my sweet sister-in-law Mervie and their 3 handsome boys Kaden, Kyan, and Kellan. If you are reading this and weren’t mentioned, please know that I feel so incredibly grateful to have you in my life. I have been thinking about this website for some time and have been avoiding it because I wanted to start from the beginning and see how things evolved and do as much as possible to let people know how much they mean to me. Well, my dear husband placed the computer with the blog site in front of me one night in early April and so I had no choice but to read. So I made it through October. What a nightmare. Everyone tells me that it is all in the past but in some respects (emotional), it is hard to pick up on life from a given point. Physically, I still don’t care to know much detail. I know what I need to know and am working on building my strength. This is very different from my normal level of activity but give me a year. You all know this is not my style. I’ll figure something out. Plus I believe in the power of science! Self-assembling nanofibers injected into the spinal cords….And Jani, my wonderful soldier Rowan (this is what he told me he was when I was in the Rehab hospital in Atlanta – no question he went through a lot and I am thrilled to have the handsome ball of energy to guard me!), our little social beauty Encsi, and all of our family and friends are my motivation to make my life even more grand. I knew I was lucky before all this but now I know my fortune is extreme! “Thanks” doesn’t even begin to express my sentiments.

This letter has taken me a few weeks to write. I really am sorry to keep you all waiting. I will keep you apprised of developments as long as there is progress and you are all interested!

So to catch you up on what has been going on: I arrived home on Tuesday 3 days before my 38th birthday. Jani threw a party for me in the new house and my brother arrived on my birthday to help me celebrate. Kal and Jani each took a few of the rings I always wore and kept them on strings around their neck. On my birthday weekend, I was happy to reclaim them. So many people came to that party and it was great to see everyone…some I did not remember but I was glad to have the opportunity to meet them and thank them for helping out. Everything everyone who was there did saved my life and not to be cheesy but I am eternally grateful. As I have told my friends, there are so many more people in life I need to aggravate! Oh and speaking of cheesy, Cheesy was well looked after mostly by Teresa and Dave and they brought him home when I arrived. He is 12 now but still getting his lumpy self (he has dozens of lipomas all over but they are all benign) around well and I am very happy for his company.

The move took place on Feb 2 and again, lots of people showed up to help out. It was amazing and we appreciate it immensely. Then my parents arrived and continued to move things over from the other house for the better part of their month stay with us. In addition, they bonded with their grandkids, cooked yummy food for us, and for those of you who know my dad, you know that he went shopping all the time and not only for good things for mom to cook but also, he found a lot of great things to help make life easier. Then my brother and his family came for the week of Valentine’s Day. The kids played together and we all enjoyed each other’s company. Drew came down from DC in March to help Jani paint in the kitchen of the old house. Jani’s mom and sister Edit came at the end of March to stay with us for 2 weeks. They were tremendous is helping to look after the kids, cook, clean, and help Jani work on the other house too. Plus they were good company for Jani. His sister Edit has such as fabulously contagious laugh that I would laugh not even being able to understand what was so funny in the first place!

So, now we are moved in to this beautiful home that so many of you helped to fix up, paint, and move us into. It is a great place.

I have been going back to work as much as I can and I am very happy to be back. I missed many things about it and as hard as it is to get caught up on things, I am happy and grateful for the chance to do so.

I am in outpatient therapy 3 times/week and they are helping to conquer the mobility issues. Good folks there. I am getting stronger and more educated about how to cope with more than mobility issues and I am actually happy to go there. I get to use the pool (you all know how I love the water) a couple times per week and so that is a huge treat to get out of the chair and do some cardiovascular exercise!

Medically, most of you know more than I do about what happened but I’ll tell you where I am now. My dexterity is good in both hands. My left hand is always colder than my right – probably some vessels got messed up so my circulation isn’t the same. My right shoulder causes me pain but since I depend on my arms and shoulders for everything, I think that this will be a constant battle. My hormones are still awry and so I am taking an ADH analogue to keep from dumping fluid abnormally (well, too abnormally in that I don’t become severely dehydrated like I did 5 months ago). They say there is nothing wrong with my pituitary and that what is wrong will right itself over time. My physiology says different but hopefully with time the problem will get fixed. I have no sensation below my chest level but I might be getting some ability to contract my upper abs a little bit. The rest of my muscles spasm when I change posture but this doesn’t get in the way of most things and so I am glad that they contract to retain some tone. As I understand it, the first 18 months are the critical healing time and so I have another year in which anything can happen….although there are reports of people getting up and walking 5 years later and so on and so we hang on to the hope that my body will also perform such great feats!!

Van Products just called that my van is ready and so we’re going to get it 4/17. This van is possible because of all the generous contributions you have all made. It has a lift that operates by remote, I will be able to strap my chair in behind me, transfer to the driver’s seat, and off I go! Not having to have Jani hoist me into the Armada will be a good thing for his back and I will be happy not to have to ask him to take me to work and therapy. Plus, obviously it is another step toward independence so THANKS!!! And for any who may question it or wonder how such a thing works, I have passed my driver’s evaluation which involved using my left hand to push a lever for gas (down) and brake (forward) and my right hand to steer using a bracket (attached to the steering wheel) with a knob on it so I don’t have to do hand over hand. Something to get used to for sure but hopefully I’ll be the soccer mom extraordinaire when that time comes! At any rate, I am so glad to be here to see my sweet nugget Rowan be his wonderful 4.5 year old self and have his first day at school which will be this fall. (He has slept next to me nearly every night since I have been home and even though this age brings curiosity and defiance that is well…. let me say confusing to reasonable people, he is a good soul). Who knows what Encsi will want to try but I am happy to be here to watch her grow. Her smile and her gorgeous chubby thighs (she’ll be so mad about this10 years from now!) are simply addictive. And then there is Jani, my loving, wise, seriously silly but wonderfully sexy fireman (to be - starting 4/28!) husband…well, my heart is too full for words.

So as things progress from here, I will let you know how things are going. Thanks so much for sticking with me through all this. There is no question that this situation is traumatic in many ways but I have a great life to live in many ways too and I will continue to do so……so stay tuned!